Tuesday, April 27, 2010

上帝赐给男人的生命

On the very first day, God created the cow. He said to the cow, "Today I have created you! As a cow, you must go to the field with the farmer all day long. You will work all day under the sun! I will give you a life span of 50 years."

The cow objected, "What? This kind of a tough life you want me to live for 50 years? Let me have 20 years, and the 30 years I'll give back to you." So God agreed.

第一天,上帝创造了牛,并对牛说:“今天,我创造了你!做为一头牛,你必须每天陪农夫下田,从晨早工作至昏暮。我赐给你50年的寿命。”

牛大声抗议:“甚麽?你要我过50年这种苦命日子,我看20年就够了,剩下的30年,还给你吧!”

上帝答应了。


On the second day, God created the dog. God said to the dog, "You are supposed to do is to sit all day by the door of your house. Any people that come in, you will have to bark at them! I'll give a life span of 20 years."

The dog objected, "What? All day long to sit by the door? No way! I give you back my other 10 years of life!" So God agreed.

第二天,上帝创造了狗,并对狗说:“你的角色,就是每天坐在门边,任何人走过,对他们吠就可以了。我赐给你20年生命。”

狗也大声抗议:“有没有搞错?整天坐在门边乱吠?这样的日子,10年就够了,另10年还给你好了。”

上帝答应了。
On the third day, God created the monkey. He said to the monkey, "Monkeys have to entertain people. You've got to make them laugh and do monkey tricks. I'll give you 20 years life span."

The monkey objected. "What? Make them laugh? Do monkey faces and tricks? Ten years will do, and the other 10 years I'll give you back." So God agreed.

第三天,上帝又创造了猴子,并对猴子说:“猴子的任务,就是耍猴戏取乐人类,我赐你20年生命。”

猴子大声抗议:“搞笑?这种日子10年已够苦了,剩下的10年,你拿回去吧!”

上帝答应了。
On the fourth day, God created man and said to him, "Your job is to sleep, eat, and play. You will enjoy very much in your life. All you need to do is to enjoy and do nothing. This kind of life, I'll give you a 20 year life span."

The man objected. "What? Such a good life! Eat, play, sleep, do nothing? Enjoy the best and you expect me to live only for 20 years? No way, man!....Why don't we make a deal? Since the cow gave you back 30 years, and the dog gave you back 10 years and the monkey gave you back 10 years, I will take them from you! That makes my life span 70 years, right?" So God agreed.

第四天,上帝创造了男人,并对男人说:“你就只是吃喝玩乐,甚麽都不必做。我赐你20年生命。”

男人尖声抗议:“甚麽?只是吃喝玩乐?如此美妙的人生,20年太短了吧?不如这样,老上帝,前几天那些牛狗猴都不要的日子,就给了我吧!加加起来,也只不过有70年爽而已。”

上帝答应了。
AND THAT'S WHY.... In our first 20 years, we eat, sleep, play, enjoy the best and do nothing much. For the next 30 years, we work all day long, suffer and get to support the family. For the next 10 years, we entertain our grandchildren by making monkey faces and monkey tricks. And for the last 10 years, we stay at home, sit by the front door and bark at people.

於是,男人的一生就这样开始了,首20年,我们甚麽都不必做,就只是吃喝玩乐,开心无比,接着的30年,我们日夜工作到好像牛一样,为谁辛苦为谁忙?接着下来的10年,又得扮猴脸,耍猴戏,逗甚麽都不用做的孙子开心,然後,在最後的10年,每天守在门口,等看有谁经过,就跟他们发一发唠叨,或者发一发疯。

10 comments:

安哥爵 said...

上帝和阿武叔都开了我一个玩笑.把我推在门口....我什么都只做到一半,其他是真空的.

草禾刀, blee said...

哈哈,是不是男人女人都一样??

Anonymous said...

我看到的故事是“人类”,不只是男人啦!

001 said...

我看到的故事是“人类”,不只是男人啦!

(刚才那个是我来的,无端端变匿名,你就删除吧!)

小鬼零零壹 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
梦熊 - 张峰与 (Wallace Teo) said...

哈哈.. 好有趣

保活 PoWKilLeR said...

狂风暴雪之后,会否可见彩虹?~不知道.
树倒地裂之后,会否再见万物重生?~不知道…
祝你長寿,幸福.
http://powkiller.blogspot.com/
欢迎常来看看我,,
~我是壞友PoWKilLeR.

大米 said...

五点正,我老公问你最近干嘛,为什么整天在贴笑话??

阿武叔 Uncle Boo said...

草禾刀,001:我觉得女人比较勤劳啦!小小年纪都开始帮忙做家务了。

安哥爵,你在门口是招待客人的,又不只是吠!

梦熊,保话:多谢光临!多多指教!

大米:最近有点“萧”嘛!

丘仲尼 said...

所以说,70大限,人类必须活过70岁,才能够做回自己,才能够过自己喜欢的生活。。。!

爱你镭啦!